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I’ve always felt that if the relationship is working well and both people are happy, marriage is just a title.But that title has a risk attached to it (and thanks to “horror stories”, the news, movies, media, etc.Sharing your feelings with him is fine, but you want it to be from a place of love and understanding and not from a place of frustration and impatience.Personally, my criteria for getting married is: Other than those reasons (and I would need to have all 3 be true), I would not get married. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t date a girl long term to see where it goes, but unless I’m at a point where those conditions are all true for me, I wouldn’t marry yet. We’ve had our problems but have worked through it all and I really want him to pop the question already.There was a moment when he talked about us being married, but he joked that I should be the one to get him the ring.
When you can understand why a guy might have reservations to getting married (or at least, might not be motivated to get married), it will help you communicate better and ultimately get you to a place where you may both decide it’s time for marriage. That’s just my personal view and I’m not suggesting or projecting that anyone else should share it.
Most guys have heard enough horror stories to know that tying the knot isn’t going to make a woman any less likely to cheat or leave, so there’s a general attitude that it’s not to our advantage to risk half of our income on the chance that everything works out.
(Quick insert here: I’ve gotten LOTS of comments that there are many marriages where the woman makes more money than the man and she ends up getting financially screwed.
In fact, this fear makes many guys avoid marriage like the plague…
The fear for guys is that it’s going to be a really crappy deal if things fall apart.
I’ve met plenty of women who are in a hurry to get married.